Nothing like coffee and a sleeping baby..

Yesterday was an adventure to say the least. Flynn did not want to sleep Tuesday night. He went the first 4 hour block great. He woke up like clock work at midnight. He did not finish his bottle though and was up again at 2 then he woke up again at 3am! By then it was just a matter of saying screw it and staying up. Chris had to get ready for work so I stayed up as well. It meant I was able to shower while he was still here.

Flynn and I both had Doctor appointments yesterday in Denver. I packed up both his diaper bags with formula, clothes, burp cloths, diapers, wipes, blankets, bottles, his baby monitor and a book for me haha. We headed to Children's Hospital around 6:30 to account for traffic and go down there at about a quarter to 8. We were needless to say about 45 minutes early when I parked the Jeep and that is when I realized I forgot his stroller. It wasn't that big a deal but I'm still building up my strength and his car seat gets heavy!

We made it inside fine. I found a family bathroom and Flynn had his first ever public building diaper change. Haha. So many silly firsts out there for us to experience together.

They took us at the Eye Clinic pretty quickly. I felt so bad for him. Preemies are prone to a condition called Retinopathy of Prematurity (ROP) which is caused due to the blood vessels to the retina developing abnormally. Anyway, in the NICU Flynn was cleared but had to have a follow-up because his retina blood vessels had not fully matured yet. I was not there when they did that initial exam. Yesterday I found it out they were really close to being mature at that point. Which had I known would have made me worry much less. He saw the same doctor at Children's as he did at UCH. Mainly because they are right next to each other they share a lot of physicians. The UCH NICU is a level 3 and Children's is a lvl 4. He could have gone over to Children's had he been in worse shape when he was born, that is where all the babies requiring extra care/surgeries go.

I know the eye exam didn't hurt him but it wasn't pleasant to watch. He cried his eyes out while the nurse put the eye drops in his eyes. First numbing ones and then dilation ones. I got to hold him for a while after that while the dilation ones set in. The whole exam felt like a normal eye visit. I've worn glasses since I was 8. I know what its like to go through dilation and all of that. I didn't think about how babies don't know how to look left and right on command this young or to keep their eyes open with the bright light in their face. I stayed for the whole thing, I wanted him to know I was there but I had trouble watching as they clamped his eyes open and she manually turned his eyes. I'm grateful the nurse held him while she did the exam. It was over quick and he was back in my arms. He was also cleared as she announced his retina vessels were fully mature! No more eye visits until next year. They said to come back between 6-12 months so I picked April as a good 8 month range. Preemies are more prone to need corrective lenses or have other eye issues as they get older. Not all preemies will, my husband Chris has fine eye sight, his twin brother wears glasses though, and as I mentioned I do too although I'm not a preemie.

After our visit to Children's and the great news we headed to my parents house and I fed Flynn and put him down for a nap. I tried to nap too but I realized I was starving at about 10 and Flynn woke up and wasn't happy (new place and eyes still dilated) not long after that so he hung out with me on their couch for a few hours before we had to go to my own doctors appointment.

My dad came with us so he could watch Flynn in the waiting room. I think he also wanted to hear what the doctors had to say. He was always very worried about me in the hospital. He's made it clear via my mom that he doesn't want Chris and I to risk having another baby, but that is another story. This visit was a great one. They said all my stats were fine and it was great how quickly I recovered. My appointment was a follow-up with the Renal Clinic. They said they would check my proteins because it had been awhile but with my blood pressure being okay again and all my other blood work normal they didn't think their be an issue. My creatinine was only a 0.8! I remember when it was a 9! I have one more OB Post visit next week and I'm finally done with doctors for awhile. Flynn has just begun his visits but the rest should all be routine every baby visits. On Monday he gets his 2 month immunizations. I'm so glad Chris will be there with me for that one.

Last night Flynn didn't want to sleep in the bassinet upstairs so I ended up sleeping on the couch so that Chris could sleep since he has to get up so early for work. Flynn had another similar night where he woke up at midnight and then 2am and 3am. This time he fell back to sleep though and is still sleeping so I didn't get up till 5 and can enjoy my coffee. Here is to hoping today is smoother. I plan on doing some much needed house work today and just relaxing otherwise.

So it begins..

Today is officially my first day by myself with Flynn. I mean ever. I've always had a support team, first the NICU nurses and then my husband. Today Chris went back to work leaving me with Flynn for the day. Since Chris had to go to work I got up the two times last night I had to to feed and change Flynn. Although Chris did wake up and help me at the 3am feeding.

Flynn maybe sensed the change and the simple fact he has started eating more because he wouldn't go to sleep after that feeding and at about 4:45am I ended up giving him another bottle. So in a 2 hour block he had 100ml(just over 3oz) of formula. He finally fell asleep although he is fidgeting.

We use the Dr. Brown bottles and I do think they work great. He doesn't cry much and when he does its because he wants something. It makes life easier and less stressful on me.

I am glad that I don't have any plans or requirements for today. I do plan on taking Flynn for a walk this morning after his next bottle most likely. I'm hoping he will sleep till about 8 and then I can give him his bottle and vitamins and we can go on a walk around the neighborhood.

I tried to refill my blood pressure medicine yesterday but apparently the refills had been cancelled. I've started tracking my BP over the past few days and its dropped significantly so I'm hoping when I go to my Dr. visit on Wednesday they say I don't need it anymore. The refills had been cancelled because I'd been taken off them earlier but another doctor put me back on and we weren't aware they'd cancelled the prescription. At least if I need more I can have them send them to the right pharmacy. Now that I'm home the hospital pharmacy is far from convenient.

Flynn has his 3 week follow up eye exam tomorrow. I am hoping he will be fully cleared from the risk of ROP. In case you don't know what ROP is when the blood vessels of the retina develop abnormally. It occurs in preemies and Flynn passed his exam for it but his blood vessels had not fully matured so we have to go back in. I'm taking him to the Eye Clinic in the out patient portion of Children's Hospital. When he was in the NICU he was healthy enough to stay next door in University hospital but Children's is one of the best child hospital's in the country. I think its in the top ten if I remember correctly. That is where Chris and his twin were sent 29 years ago when they were preemies. The babies that need surgeries go there. My fingers are crossed. My dad is awesome and took the day off tomorrow to help me out because I also have my own doctors appointment at University's out patient that afternoon. So I can go hangout at their house inbetween and he will help me out by watching Flynn for me during my appointment. If I think I need him there for Flynn's appointment he'll come to that too.

I'll let you know how today goes! Everyday is an adventure!

Easy like Sunday Morning.

This weekend has been going really well so far. My parents came up yesterday to see us and visit with Flynn. They so graciously allowed Chris and I to go shopping without having to worry about bringing Flynn into the store. I'm determined to limit his exposure to the outside world until he is older and his immune system is stronger. Today we have to take him to Babies'R'Us with us to pick up somethings.

My Mother-in-Law and her husband were over for dinner last night as well. In honor of all the visits we dressed up Flynn a bit. I'm proud to announce that he no longer requires the Preemie clothes as he finally fits more appropriately in his New Born sizes. I cannot wait to see how much he has gained when we go in on the 13th for his 2month visit at the pediatrician!

Such a handsome boy!

Flynn is rocking the bottle so I'm so excited. He is taking more and more each day and he seems to be on about a 3-4 hour sleep stage. He is nearly two months so soon we will increase his feedings and hopefully he will start sleeping a little longer.

We also recently found out that Flynn likes the song "Let's Go Fly a Kite" from Mary Poppins. I think its the tempo because it works wonders at calming him down.

The ring from Flynn's circumcision is finally off. I think it was really bothering him at the end as it was partially fallen off. Last night it came off fully and he stopped crying as much when being changed.

Today he may get to meet more of his family! His Aunt and Uncle and cousins have been up in the mountains at our Bi-yearly family vacation. Chris and I were unable to attend this year for obvious reasons. Two of his Uncles did not want to visit Flynn in the hospital so I'm excited for them to meet him.

Lately I've been thinking, "What about me? How am I really doing now?"

There are some things that still make it difficult for me to accept that what happened did but I've been adjusting and being able to hold Flynn now all the time really helps. Sometimes though I remember the things we missed out on and how different things are from the way they would have been if he was full term. Today we received a package from Similac. When I first found out I was pregnant I signed up for free coupons and information from Similac and Enfamil and never really thought about it. The 15th is my due date and they sent us free samples of formula I'm not really sure what to do with them. Flynn is on a very specific formula although it is Similac so we can use the coupons they gave us at least.

This kind of stuff as well has hearing what people did with their kids when they were babies is hard for me. Hard because I feel like I'm going to miss out on certain aspects of having a baby. Although I treasure every moment of his life and and look forward to getting to know my little man I can't help but wonder.

I'm also nervous because Chris goes back to work on Tuesday at which point I'm on my own and truly a stay at home mom. We shall see how things go. I may have more adventures by then to share with all of you.

Doctors appointments and just life in general. Coming up in full force this week.

So much to remember..

I love my son and I want to share him with the world. If not I wouldn't be doing this right? Well people do not realize that as a preemie he isn't like a regular 7 week old baby. I have to remember my patience when dealing with family and friends.

I want them to see him but he just came home. In my opinion trying to limit how much we go out for now is completely acceptable. In fact the nurses at the NICU indicated we should try and keep him home more. I'm really nervous about his party on the 18th. I am prepared to have lots of hand sanitizer and make sure people are washing their hands and I am not afraid to tell people no but I do feel some guilt, I'm not ready to take our son to a lot of public places. Maybe in a few weeks but he is still so small and young. So for now no unnecessary trips.

I have to remember that not everyone is familiar with preemies. How at this point its not about how many ounces he eats but how many milliliters. Which is is doing better every day. Yesterday he took 210mLs (7oz) and last night about 165mL(5.5oz). We track in 12 hour chunks. The pediatrician told us to just slowly increase his feedings as he feels ready for them. He is only taking the 60mL (2oz) some of the time and we are dealing with that every so common spit up. His reflux is very mild which makes me happy and we've been burping him several times a feeding. The NICU nurses always said he was a good burper and he was even known for it in the NICU! The paperwork we were given by the Pediatrician also mentioned to help ease reflux and spit up to have him sit up for up to 30 minutes after feedings and to be honest its really working!

We took Flynn on his first walk yesterday. It went well. He is still so small that he slept the whole time. We plan on taking him again this evening. On the walk we stopped at a bakery in town. We live in a very small town. I'm talking one restaurant and now this bakery kind of small town. It was really nice and we had yummy gelato. ^_^ Still Flynn slept and I wasn't so worried being there because we were the only ones there aside from the girl working.

Chris doing PT with Flynn

Doing his physical therapy and getting him to take his vitamins gets easier with time. We even did a little tummy time yesterday. He lifted his head twice for me! I plan on doing it everyday. Hopefully he will like it better each day. 

Flynn after a feeding but not yet sleepy

So far this morning he seems to be up every two hours. Although he did let us relax for a good 4 hours from about 4am to 8am. I know he isn't even two months old yet but I'm going to be happy when he sleeps later. We've been told for now to not let him sleep over 4 hours. 

I can't help but pick him up as well as photograph him. I love his expressions!

Settling In

Our first night with Flynn home was pretty rough. He was up every hour or so to eat or be changed. Yesterday he became a total rock star with his food though although he spit up a bit as the day went on (what baby doesn't?).  

We took Flynn to Walmart with us yesterday morning and it went well he stayed asleep during the trip and since Chris and I were exhausted we didn't stay out long. We ended up not getting the Diaper Genie but my Mother-in-law knew we were looking for one and went shopping on her lunch break with a co-worker who actually bought it for us as a baby gift. Its pretty nice. ^_^

Everything is getting easier for us and last night went much more smooth. Flynn took more food at each feeding and therefore slept for longer intervals and Chris and I got a little sleep! I could have partly been just because we were exhausted ourselves. We went to bed around 11pm after Flynn had fed one last time. He woke up around 1am and then again around 4am just taking over the minimum for the 12 hour period. 

This morning Flynn had his first check visit with his pediatrician. She was really nice and said he is doing great. She said that they will try and see if the insurance company will cover the care for RSV but that since he was so healthy and will be a bit older by cold and flu season they may not cover the care. That is a bummer since that is when he will be in daycare but maybe they will cover the medication. We shall see how things go. 

Flynn did not gain any weight but she said not to worry since the scale is different and he was still adjusting to his new surroundings. He has to go back in 2 weeks for his first immunizations and they will weigh him then and we will need to be concerned if he hasn't gained by then. Currently he is 6lbs 11oz. 

Poor guy has to go to the pediatric opthamologist next week and then back to the pediatrician the following week for his first set of immunizations and a weight check. 

Going to take him on his first walk in his stroller tonight. Can't wait to get out and stretch my legs its been a few days since I've taken a walk. I was doing really well getting a 45 minute walk in almost daily when I was staying in Denver during his time in the NICU. I need a new routine now. I hope when I go in for my last post par-tum appointment they clear me to start doing more exercise. 

Alright I need to get some cleaning done while he is still asleep he'll be waking up soon I think.